You know when your face gets hot, you feel a little dizzy, like you might lose your lunch?

Or when someone says something that just breaks your heart, but deep down you already knew that's what they were going to say, and you could crawl under a rock cursing yourself for being so stupid? "How could you?"

Or when you look up and sheepishly ask, "Why God? I thought this was finally it, no?"

I am sick to my stomach with fear; dizzy in thought; and waiting for the tears.