i fear love just as i fear death

I would give you my heart if you simply ask.

My feelings are pure, honest, and true. I want your comfort, your soul, your heart. When you are near I feel a certainty within my own soul. Many times I dared to tell you how much I care, but I cannot. I set out to toss a bottle containing a single sentence made from seven small words, but never made it to the ocean. Out of fear I never took that drive. Once that bottle is tossed I can't take it back - it becomes permanent. It becomes a beacon of my constant agony.

I fell. I fell for the beautiful words that flutter from your extraordinary mind. I fell for your actions, your dreams, your ability to stir things up every now and again. I fell for the chances you take that nobody else dares. I fell for the small surprises you give me, and the things you teach me each day. When you lay next to me everything is okay, it's as it should be. The monotony of life disappears; I forget about my struggles and sorrows. All is well in the world – perfect, simple and true. I love that. I also love that I don’t feel the constant need to talk; somehow it feels as if our hearts are doing the talking for us. With you, our silence is comfortable and conversation comes easily. I allowed you to move my soul. Even after a year, my heart skips a beat at the sight of you, and my breath is taken at the sound of your voice.

I want to witness everything: your triumphs, and conquests. I want to be your companion and your ally. I want to walk with you in your times of anguish, and hardship, though I don’t see there being many. I have fallen in love with you twice. Though you were not always the same person, you merely shared the same casing. The first time I was unaware of your true magnificence, and beauty, the second time was by far the best feeling I have ever felt. Allowing me to fall and delve into your soul was the best gift you could ever give me. For everything; there is not one thing I would change, you are perfect in every way.

You see Rob; I fear love just as I fear death. I fear that if I tell you this, this love I feel for you is unrequited, and it is apt to leave my heart hanging heavily in my chest. I fear the tears I shall shed will never cease. It was once said, “Waiting hurts. Forgetting hurts. But not knowing which decision to take is the worst of suffering." It is true. This is exactly how I feel.

Original message in a bottle: “Simply, I am in love with you.”