slipping away

So much has been given to me from God and from others that I feel I need to give it back to my community in a remarkable way. Lately I've so been consumed with money, money, money, and bills, bills, bills that I want to do something where the reward isn't for me at all, but for someone else. Life isn't just about me, and it's fragile.

Monday I am going to see if I can volunteer at an old folks home. There is something about the older folk that amazes me. Their stories, their way of life, their youth; all very different and foreign to everything I know. I love how big families used to get by on so little and now we have so much junk and money and we can't get by. We live in a time of more; we can't get enough sh*t in our lives! We have more struggles, we are more sick, more overweight, more stressed out, and way less happy than we used to be. Even just talking with my Grandma (who is slowly losing track of who we all are) reminds me every time we speak that I need to slow down and smell the flowers or before I know it, I either won't be able to bend over to smell them, or they'll be on my coffin at my funeral. She's right. I'm forgetting to take the 30 or more minutes a day and just enjoy this beautiful life I've created. It's so easy for me to hustle and bustle and forget about the good things, the simple things.


In thinking about how much society has changed, I almost want to say I won't have my own children because of this. I think back 12 years ago to when I was in the middle of high school, I didn't have a cell phone glued to my head, I worked hard for my first car, it is the exact opposite right now. Imagine what high school will be like 15 years from now. How scary will it be being a teenager in 2026? I don't want to have to put my own children through that. I can't. We have a plethora resources and tools today and we still can't cope with our sh*t. I cannot comprehend how stressful my own son or daughter's lives would be, torturous maybe.