Random thoughts:
I am not myself; rejection becomes easier this way. I call it rejection protection.
I have made multiple poor decisions this last week. Need grace. I know I am not alone in my struggle, but at times I feel this way.
Looking back on this year and I realized that I have made many changes, both big and small, which is not how I roll - at all. I wonder if I made too many too soon. Not that I feel regretful in any way, there is just a plethora of them, and is currently a lot to handle.
I have been feeling a little frustrated and wondering when or if I might ever catch a break. I am very fortunate and have always had a walk in the park compared to the vast majority of people, but this life isn’t what I want. I am merely settling for the life I hold. I feel that if I remain in this place I will suddenly wake up old, filled with regret, looking back and shaking my head.
All I know is that lately the idea of running away and escaping has been mighty tempting. It is easier to pick up your things, give up, and try to start over elsewhere. I am after all a coward; facing my fears has never been my forte.
Was reminded:
Exodus 14:14 says, “The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”
that's an excellent passage! I have to put that in my prayer journal. But remember what Exodus means: a journey to escape.... Sometimes we need an environmental shift--that is not cowardice. Now i'm not saying get up and go, but I am urging you to cut yourself some slack.
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